[ Daigo is nigh on helplessly compassionate, and it sounds... very difficult to know so little about something that has changed your life. His head tilts, looking deeply. ]
The term encompasses both magical energy and life force. It's... not quite the same as the manna here. But since most Servants count among the dead, they don't produce their own.
I am not dead, but what I generate by myself is not enough long term for both of us. Flat was supporting me before, but...
[Waver's lips press together as he sinks against the couch. He doesn't like causing Daigo worry at all.]
If I'm lucky, I'll find another person to be able to support me like Flat did. A 'Master'. It's what I'll be looking out for the long term... but, it would absolutely have to be the right person. The consequences could be severe, even fatal, for at least one of us if I don't.
[That sounds ominous, doesn't it?]
In the meantime...
If there's no Master, then there's more temporary reprieves. I'm feeding from the land, but not all Servants can do that. Feeding by drinking the blood of or having sex with the magically powerful we find more effective. So, I'm going to see if I can arrange to get regular donations to supplement what I'm already doing.
[Daigo can already guess how Waver feels about the sexual option. So blood it is.]
I mean... I've already been relocated to an alien planet and turned into a monster at regular intervals.
[ So his disbelief is actually pretty easy to suspend. It's about as palatable as Shaxx being an immortal warrior in some hard to parse war against the Darkness. ]
Sometimes I feel like everyone has saved the world except for me.
[ He doesn't even realize what a statement that is while he's making it, but it is deeply and unpleasantly resonant. He's always holding down the fort while others trudge out ahead without him. It's not a small piece of his relentless, heart-dropping inadequacy. He laughs it off, looking away for a moment. ]
So you must have met quite a few interesting Servants?
It's the funniest things that actually end up saving the world, you know.
[Waver is smiling at him, but somberly, as he reaches up to touch Daigo's face. There's more bite in that statement than Daigo knows. He's intimately familiar with it. To watch from the sidelines... to be able to do nothing...
To be always left behind.
He told the last Master of Humanity of the incredible strength needed to endure that. It's far easier being on the front lines, the one called to make the sacrifice...
The world is always in need of saving. People only pay attention to the work when things go off the rails.]
Mmm... many people. From Jeanne D'Arc to Boudica to Caesar to... Alexander the Great.
[ It's not envy for the heroics, it's just a matter of wanting the heroes in his life to stop hurting him. An awkward position to be in when knowing there's nothing to do but step aside for the greater good over and over again. He would possibly rather die than have that conversation. ]
Wow, I'm so outclassed with a pedigree like that.
[ It doesn't genuinely bother him. If nothing else, he is perfectly secure in how they feel about each other. ]
[Waver 'hmms' and decides to lean slightly on Daigo in response, eyes shuttering momentarily. Still faintly smiling. He can feel how secure he is in confronting that. Hear it. It's......... something if he were put in Daigo's position he can't claim.
But... he's glad about it. That he's unbothered. It eases something in him that Waver didn't even know was in tension.]
Alexander is the Iskandar I've told you about.
Just... a different version of him.
[Yes... the mysterious Iskandar, Waver mentioned once so long ago.
A pint-sized version. The prince that will grow up to be his King. Waver loves him just as fiercely, even though how it's expressed is not the same.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2022-02-14 12:35 am (UTC)From:Oh. What does... that mean for you... ?
no subject
Date: 2022-02-14 12:48 am (UTC)From:... well... to start, I'm not human now. My needs are in line with regular Servants, pretty much, rather than what they were before.
Long term? I can't say. I'll likely keep my memory when this ends and I go back to normal, which is abnormal for regular Servants, but beyond that...
[He doesn't know for certain. There's a helpless raising of his hands.]
no subject
Date: 2022-02-14 01:08 am (UTC)From:Ok. What is it servants need?
no subject
Date: 2022-02-14 01:52 am (UTC)From:Mana.
The term encompasses both magical energy and life force. It's... not quite the same as the manna here. But since most Servants count among the dead, they don't produce their own.
I am not dead, but what I generate by myself is not enough long term for both of us. Flat was supporting me before, but...
[Surprise, your boyfriend is an energy vampire.]
no subject
Date: 2022-02-15 02:03 am (UTC)From:Have you been all right?
no subject
Date: 2022-02-15 03:16 am (UTC)From:I've been careful about not using any magecraft and feeding from the land, but it's not the best situation.
I know my options. They're just varying levels of less than ideal.
no subject
Date: 2022-02-16 12:25 am (UTC)From:What are you going to do?
no subject
Date: 2022-02-19 02:41 am (UTC)From:If I'm lucky, I'll find another person to be able to support me like Flat did. A 'Master'. It's what I'll be looking out for the long term... but, it would absolutely have to be the right person. The consequences could be severe, even fatal, for at least one of us if I don't.
[That sounds ominous, doesn't it?]
In the meantime...
If there's no Master, then there's more temporary reprieves. I'm feeding from the land, but not all Servants can do that. Feeding by drinking the blood of or having sex with the magically powerful we find more effective. So, I'm going to see if I can arrange to get regular donations to supplement what I'm already doing.
[Daigo can already guess how Waver feels about the sexual option. So blood it is.]
no subject
Date: 2022-02-20 02:19 am (UTC)From:Ok. There's a lot of those around.
[ So that seems like something that can be accomplished. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-02-20 02:50 am (UTC)From:There are. Which is honestly relieving.
[He just has to arrange it carefully.]
You alright? This is... a lot. [A quiet chuckle.] I haven't even told you the story yet.
no subject
Date: 2022-02-20 06:18 am (UTC)From:[ He's not the hungry manna vampire. ]
I mean... I've already been relocated to an alien planet and turned into a monster at regular intervals.
[ So his disbelief is actually pretty easy to suspend. It's about as palatable as Shaxx being an immortal warrior in some hard to parse war against the Darkness. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-02-20 10:23 am (UTC)From:Touché.
[He's going to drink this tea before it goes stone cold on him first.]
... well, the story boils down to roughly this. The world experienced an apocalypse and Servants were summoned to correct it.
no subject
Date: 2022-02-20 03:21 pm (UTC)From:Sometimes I feel like everyone has saved the world except for me.
[ He doesn't even realize what a statement that is while he's making it, but it is deeply and unpleasantly resonant. He's always holding down the fort while others trudge out ahead without him. It's not a small piece of his relentless, heart-dropping inadequacy. He laughs it off, looking away for a moment. ]
So you must have met quite a few interesting Servants?
no subject
Date: 2022-02-20 09:30 pm (UTC)From:[Waver is smiling at him, but somberly, as he reaches up to touch Daigo's face. There's more bite in that statement than Daigo knows. He's intimately familiar with it. To watch from the sidelines... to be able to do nothing...
To be always left behind.
He told the last Master of Humanity of the incredible strength needed to endure that. It's far easier being on the front lines, the one called to make the sacrifice...
The world is always in need of saving. People only pay attention to the work when things go off the rails.]
Mmm... many people. From Jeanne D'Arc to Boudica to Caesar to... Alexander the Great.
no subject
Date: 2022-02-22 04:37 pm (UTC)From:Wow, I'm so outclassed with a pedigree like that.
[ It doesn't genuinely bother him. If nothing else, he is perfectly secure in how they feel about each other. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-03-21 07:57 pm (UTC)From:But... he's glad about it. That he's unbothered. It eases something in him that Waver didn't even know was in tension.]
Alexander is the Iskandar I've told you about.
Just... a different version of him.
[Yes... the mysterious Iskandar, Waver mentioned once so long ago.
A pint-sized version. The prince that will grow up to be his King. Waver loves him just as fiercely, even though how it's expressed is not the same.]